January 10th, 2007

Subject: superglue day Time: 06:41 pm

balls

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November 20th, 2006

Time: 12:37 am

so. you thought youd make me feel like shit for not seeing you? thats fine. thats great. you do that. ill meet you. so i rearrange my entire weekend to see you. thats cool. i dont mind. ill even call you and make the effort too. ill wait around in town for 7 hours or so while you do your thing even though it was your request that i meet you. i'll even then call you AGAIN. i dont mind any of that. but what do i mind? hmmm.... I KNOW!!! "oh. yeah. i might text you. y'know. whatever" ok you absolute fucking twat. i agree its maybe my fault that you dont know whats going on with me. i dont talk to you any more. so ill give you a little run down. just for you. i dont talk to you as much anymore because i dont get the fucking chance. or to talk to ANYONE else for that matter. im either at college which is lovely and stressful. or im at work forcing people to do something they dont want to. i get up early, and get home late. what little sleep i get is minimal because im THAT exhausted that i cant sleep! i even got a doctors line for it. exhaustion. can you believe that?? isnt that just JOLLY! Oh wait. there was another reason for it too. oh gosh darn it... i seem to have forgotten it!! hmm... lets think... oh yea! Bereavement. that was it! but not just one. nope. 3! 3 in two months! isnt that just spiffing.  yeah. so now think about it from my perspective. i actually wanted to see you. i did miss you and i was really happy and excited about it. i honestly wouldnt care if you had appologised or sounded the least bit sorry or explained what was going on, but you didnt. at all. i tried. thats it. that was my effort. so im done. thats it.  fuck you, you cunt.

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September 24th, 2006

Time: 01:28 pm

you have got to be fucking kidding me.

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September 21st, 2006

Time: 05:39 pm

fucker.

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September 3rd, 2006

Current Music: town called hypocricy (sp?) Time: 10:28 pm Current Mood: grateful

yeah.  thank-you. so much.. seriously. cant express or say it enough. it meant the world to me. thank-you =)   xxx

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August 8th, 2006

Time: 11:30 pm Current Mood: tired

well the wait is over...   y'all happy?

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July 12th, 2006

Current Music: nill Time: 10:51 pm Current Mood: calm

my mother, genious that she is, has left me the house all to myself for a week. infact longer than that. she is now staying away until tuesday. i like it a lot. i am much less stresses, i have a job now for which i am doing well and meeting new people, i am happy. glen and i are no longer together. i am happy (although have too much free time)  sivan and i are also planning a "party" involving cheese. please do come.  so yeah.... how y'all doin'?

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June 23rd, 2006

Current Music: somewhere a clock is ticking Time: 11:23 pm Current Mood: amused

IMPORTANT - PLEASE READ Me: "So Dean, Paul's foot wants a re-match" Dean:  "Yeah? Well tell him my ass is ready for him anytime" LoveLoveLove!!! **Grin**, **Mwah!**

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June 14th, 2006

Current Music: still breaking benjamin Current Location: home Time: 03:57 pm Current Mood: giddy

um... DEAN!!!!! Damn you!!!! *shakes fist*

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Current Music: breaking benjamin/something depressing Current Location: home Time: 10:22 am Current Mood: hopeful

well... *waves* my life is... more complicated than it should be. and i read all my old journal entries last night. dead too. that was ... refreshing. [  Maybe you're scared of rejection, well i can't reject you! you're too quick for me!  ] -thank you.

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February 9th, 2006

Current Music: BARENAKED LADIES Subject: BLESS!!!! Time: 12:21 pm Current Mood: chipper

awww, bless its little .. purple paws!!! *grin*

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October 30th, 2005

Time: 01:23 pm

also, my hair is really really [gay]

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Current Music: brand new Subject: the joys of overthinking Time: 01:15 pm Current Mood: amused

To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer; not to love is to suffer; to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy, then, is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be unhappy, one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you're getting this down. hmm.....

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October 25th, 2005

Current Music: KT Tunstall : Suddenly I See Time: 02:06 pm Current Mood: happy

*Clears throat* today, was a good day. or it was in my humble opinion. the beginning was shite. media and oce again the same thing repeated to the point of insanity. i cant listen to it any more. i just cant. i swear the more i hear it the less i remember about it. in english, gary and chris had a wonderful conversation about needing to pee and how it was "touching the cloth". a conversation which (of course) i was joyfully included in by Chris. for the rest of the highly boring time however, my hand ached for i was writing far too much more than any sane person should in 40 minutes. we had mrs ferguson for mrs drew was in a meeting... or something like that. (i wasnt really paying all that much attention.) notes on "Death of a Naturalist". *ARGH* break, nothing of all that much happened, or so i dont remember, and therefore to me, nothing interesting happened at all. this is where it started getting good. we actually god to DO SOMETHING in pe!!! we played basketball and sinse we had fraser (who is amazing) we won... (i was in his team) but hes really nice. like, if youre not doing anything or are left out he'll deliberately try and include you in the game, even if he knows youre shit. i was surprised, and i dont know why. but it was a pleasant surprise. we were thrashing john's team till mr harvey got there. and watching him and fraser was just... amazing. lol, everyone had their mouthes open. and i scored 3 times. thw whole thing was just fun and hillarious so it was good again =D erm.... PSE. we did personal statements which wasnt all taht interesting in itself but i got to talk to jenni and jane. and Mrs little. we talked about glen and i giggled, lots =D not cause it was glen, im not THAT sad but cause she started talking about Lucy as well and just things about glen like how wonderful he was etc etc etc. lunch, again nothing that memorable, except i couldnt finish my lunch which im dreadfully DREADFULLY ashamed of =$ maths, again in itself, wasnt interesting. but i found im not as nervous about the NAB as i thought i would be after Mr Sinclairs "you have NO excuse for failing the NAB blahblahblah!"but i could do all the questions and i could do them all reasonably quickly as well. i bet the ones in the actual thing are like 6.7947 times harder than the practices and im screwed.. but hey... theres always the re-sit???????? walked home with jennifer who smoked *ick* then sprayed perfume so she smelled like GIRL!!!! and amin as well, talked about the corpse bride and other stuff. i was just really happy and i couldnt really work out why. nothign especially intersting happened at all, the day just had a nicer feel to it than any have recently. im getting on better with glen, no arguments (*yay*) and just *** *** **** *** * **** ***!!! im also now an OC fan (Sorry jennifer, its very good and i was very very wrong. Seth's HOT!! and i guess thats another reason im happy. havnt had a programme to enjoy inn ages) good GOD how sad is that??? =S anyway, im done. have an update for i have a lack of anything better to do sinse ive watched all the episodes now *cries* hopefully get our history results back tomorrow. even if i failed, i still want to know =) good day all! =D

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October 1st, 2005

Current Music: appocolyptica (sp?) - Path, vol 2 Time: 09:17 pm Current Mood: peaceful

ok, for everyone's benifit, and to clear things up... (not that you care it just saves me explaining things to you all individually if any of you see glen and i together) we were on a break because he had lost his motivation, and for him this was a big deal. if he has no motivation he doesnt want to be with the person because he thinks its unfair.. he had been feeling like this sinse apparently before summer (man that boy can lie) but he didnt tell me about it so i continued thinking everything was ok until one evening he broke. He explained everything but by this time it was very very far gone and even he didnt think he would get it back. we went on a break so he could try get it back. neither of us thought he would get it back so i managed to convince myself it was over and told everyone so. hense me telling you all it was over. i partly told you all that because its what i wanted to believe because i didnt want to get hurt again... anyway, we met on friday (as those of you who walk down the stairs will know or have noticed) he discovered he really missed me and he got it back, so we are now starting to see each other again. im very happy about it but very confused as well. and for future reference, my mother does not now and does not in the next... oh... 4 months need to know anything about it. we are not "back together" yet, but it does look like we will be. i appologise if i confused any of you. on another note: Congratulations emily Jennifers braces look cool Dean still owes me cake (and i appologise for yelling at him/you) I had a good day with Caitlin (finally) I was getting on well with my mother, but currently she annoys the hell out of me. I am nearly finished my book. Jenni, i hope youre having/had fun at camp. Caron, i need more frappaccino (sp) Hayley, i really want to chew the string in your ear (i dont know why) Sivan, i didnt tell you to your face because when i have in previous situations you have gone silent and not talked to me for the next half an hour or so. I am happy, and i love you guys. all of you. I appreciate you more than you know and more than i show and i appologise for not doing so more often. there have an update. wasnt worth it, was it?

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September 22nd, 2005

Time: 05:04 am Current Mood: sick

sarah is not well, she is not well at ALL.

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September 11th, 2005

Time: 01:47 pm

i wish i could update. i just cant bring myself to. im so sorry.

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August 18th, 2005

Time: 01:50 pm Current Mood: lonely

i, am lonely. this, sucks. actually, this sucks bollocks.

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August 16th, 2005

Current Music: wanting question Time: 12:05 pm Current Mood: morose

im back. i have my eyebrow pierced. my mother didnt kill me. she didnt blame anyone, not glen, not jennifer, not even me. she doesnt like it. but i knew that. shes happpy i didnt get my tongue pierced. its all good. i got a welcoming party. i felt incredibly loved. i appreciated it. a LOT. so thank-you. whoever's idea it was. i appreciate it. erm... i went shopping today. im going shopping tomorrow. i hate shopping. i like shoes. im done. there, wasnt that worth waiting for?

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July 13th, 2005

Time: 09:59 pm

i miss glen. 2 months is a painfully long time. you all are thinking im sad i know, but when youre in the same situation you wont think what youre thinking now and I would be supportive and not say "get over is you freak" <-- emily, or words to that effect. im also suffering from an allergy of some kind and its not going away therefore i feel like utter SHIT!! =( its far too hot, i cant sleep, the heat makes me grouchy and basicly, in short, im incredibly miserable. on the plus side, because im told i can find aplus side for anything, i got an amazing tan. well there, wasnt that so worth waiting about 4 months for?? i miss glen hope you all are having good holidays =)

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